Monday, February 14, 2011

Single, for good or ill.

Love...well, what can any of us really say about it? The majority or shit, maybe the few of The People have a firm grasp on what it means. The others, the rest of us...the jaded...the betrayed, do we still have agood view on it? I dont know. It isn't the unconditional Love that I speak about no, no it is the conditional emotional Love...what I consider Our Greatest Hallucination.
It is damn hard to deny that the few of us that have muttered the words " I Love You" havent been hurt or betrayed, lied to or just simply fucked over. We ponder on it for a while and more than usual we come to some sort of realization. Perhaps we were fools for staying with them and we we sure as shit know that we will not be with that bitch or bastard ever again. But that is only in retrospect. During the doomed relationship, we stayed...either out of fear, maybe some sick weird sence of security, comfort maybe, shit maybe we were just too stupid to realize that we were in this trance. Now, i have had my fair share of halucinations...recall the initial part of the relationship...butterflies, love and lust...all the shit that clouded your instincts and got you hooked. Fuck, those were good times...but then the shit hit the fan and you woke up, the drug has slipped out of your body and your senses have come back and now what? well, you utlimatly make The Choice...take it again or move on and go through withdrawel? We all made that choice for good or ill. Now where do we go? What do we do? Well, that is the hard part. The time to accept the fact that knowing true love needs to stem from somewhere...maybe true pain. Now we have learned what it is to be in love and what it is to feel the wrath of that emotion that we knew so little of but now know so much of. No longer will we through that word around, we will keep it deep inside of us, only to be used again for that rare person.
Valentine's Day is upon us. Those of us, the Single, get to watch those, the Taken as they are brought flowers and are given kisses and get all the chocolate that they can eat. But we know the circumstances of this day...The flowers die, just as most promises. The kisses are empty, because most of them taste like lies, and All That Chocolate, well once it is all eaten, it can make you pretty depressed.

- Watching these fools all around me, while on break at Queens College. Feb 14, 2011